what dreams are made of...

Denny and I had this interesting conversation the other day about our dreams - defining what is a dream, what our personal dreams are, and discussing if their possible. I feel that everyone has a dream. I think some people are just more grounded than others. Their dreams are more practical and more attainable. Dreams of having a family, owning your own car and house, all of which are goals that can are possible within ones lifetime with some effort. Denny says that your own dreams must require some kind of strife or determination to accomplish. For example, dreams of being an astronaut require years of study in aeronautical engineering, connections into NASA, and the guts to actually risk your life to go into space. Needless to say, its not quite the same to dream of being an astronaut and dreaming to be a mom.

I think coming to Macau has definitely opened up my horizons. This experience has given me new found strength to accomplish my goals in life. Before coming here, I could barely stand the idea of being away from my family and friends for so long. At first I thought that the sacrifices I had to make were greater than the actual rewards of a Fulbright grant. I believed I would miss to much, my relationships wouldn't be the same, and I would change. In the end, I dug deep and I found the courage to move thousands of miles away from everyone that I know and love to start a new life in Macau. Every single day I'm abroad, I'm amazed how well I've adjusted, how well I've coped with my homesickness, and how I've created a network of friends in Macau in just a few months. I feel incredibly blessed, but at the same time I feel that happiness is something that you work for. It just doesn't just fall out of the sky and grace you with its presence. You strive for it every day...similar to your dreams...

Asking yourself, what your dreams are can be a terribly difficult question for some or a one word answer for answers. Working at Flex, I heard the standard Asian 'dreams'...I want to be a doctor, a pharmacist, a lawyer...blah blah blah...All the typical Asian brainwashing from our parents have fostered a generation of Asian Americans who have created dreams that aren't their own. A generation of kids who don't know the hard work and sweat that is associated with those careers. A generation of kids who are too scared to stand up against their parents to be their own person with dreams of their own. A generation of kids who are too apathetic and indifferent about their spoiled lives to even create their goals - something to define who they are.

I kinda wish that my dream would be so simple. I wish it were the one word answer that would foster the happiness and pride of all Asian parents. Instead my dreams are much too complex. I have several dreams. I will discuss in no particular order. I have one dream of beginning a non-profit organization that provides academic services to help underprivileged Filipino American youth gain access to higher education. When you think about Filipino Americans, my parents generation are hard working immigrants who have professional careers in the health industry, but for some reason my generation of Filipino Americans have veered off track. Some have dropped out of college, some have had babies, and some even have never finished high school. I feel that parents promote the importance of education but somehow their kids are drawn into social circles that don't value school. I would like to create an organization that would give students free services to help them to stay focused during high school and eventually get into college. The program would provide them with college preparatory services, such as academic tutoring and test prep, internships to explore various industries, and mentoring services.

Another dream I have is to run for the board of education. I've always felt that to really change the system you must work in policy. You actually have the power to implement changes to better the community and our schools. Running for political office is something more than just idealistic dreams. There has to be some sort of political savvy inherent in who we are...we'll see if I have what it takes. My final dream is to build a school in the Philippines. There are so many children in the Philippines that need to use education as a means to get out of poverty. Every child must get that opportunity to leave the slums. Building a school would give those students a chance...a chance to have a life that isn't constantly about barely surviving but about living life to the fullest.

Who knows what will come of these dreams...will they just be fleeting notions of my young mind or actual projects that I can see come to life with my hard work and sweat.